Wednesday, July 25, 2007

While not getting injured last night...

I spent the evening catching up on TV that I missed while on vacay. Meaning, Kathy Griffin, Bridezillas, Katie and Peter, and Flip This House (A&E version). These shows take me for a dummy. Before the commercial, they have a "Coming up on Katie and Peter" segment that lasts anywhere from 30 seconds to a minute (depending on the show) as if we can't wait the 1 1/2-3 minutes (depending on the show) to see what these crazy people will do. I, for one, know they are just using this as filler. I mean seriously, for these type of faux-reality shows, they shoot an s-load of footage. Do they really need to pad the show? I like the "Next time on Bridezillas" because I do need a preview, I can't wait another week without a glimpse, but really, I can wait for the commercial break (which I fast forward through anyway--TiVO!).

I'm probably just crazy.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Things that happen to me...and not you

I like to think of myself as a keen observer, hence the title of my blog. As I'll probably find out, I'm just like the rest of you, which in a way makes me sad, but relieved!

My venture into blogging, at the suggestion of my girlfriends, is to chronicle my clumsy life. In the past two weeks, I have suffered three totally embarrassing falls. I've been told that no adult falls as much as I do....only three-year-olds. I've also had my knees likened to a two-year-old's. It makes a girl feel good, to be compared to toddlers (as opposed to very old people who fall) so I'll go with that!

FALL NO. 1
Location: Right outside the exit doors of Toys-R-Us, Waterloo, IA
Situation: High heels, dress, little trip and boom, I went down and I took my poor little six-year-old with me. Most moms would not grab on to their 50 lb child to stabilize them, most moms would do all they could to not bring their child down with them...not me! Fortunately, he didn't get hurt, but I did. Fortunately, our T-R-U is not that busy. Anyone within eye shot would have gotten more than an eye full of my "wobbly bits" as Bridget Jones would call them! I had to go to my parents' to have them do the peroxide and everything because it hurt soooo bad. I basically skinned my entire upper calf. I had to ice it and put salve on it for the next few days. It's been healing somewhat well, until....

Fall No. 2
Location: Lake of the Ozarks---middle of the lake
Situation: I was recently on vacation with my gf's and we were boating. I was in "When in, do as" mode and thought I'd love to try tubing. So they tell me to jump in the water, then get in the tube. Well the tube is like, 3 feet tall and impossible for me to climb in to. So, I need to get back in to the boat. Well there is a little ladder on the boat, and my question was "Is there supposed to be one step?" To which the reply was, "Yep!" This little ladder is pretty much at the level of the boat. So my two gf's are trying to pull me out of the water, bless their hearts, and after about the fifth time of me falling back in because I couldn't get any footing, my friend decides to jump in. "Oh, the ladder isn't down!" Well that makes sense, now doesn't it! When the ladder came down, I was able to climb in, without incident! But I re-injured the above mentioned skinned calf.

Fall No. 3
Location: Lake of the Ozarks---on land
Situation: Nothing too much here, just being a dumb ass, walking down stairs and boom (or slap, which is what it apparently sounded like). New injuries include a possible twisted ankle (healing nicely), a swollen "undernose" (which I thought made me look like a Who from Grinch) and several scrapes and scratches. Another casualty of this fall, my sunglasses!

Hopefully there will be nothing new to report and I will just be able to impress you with the things I observe....probably not.